"Travel is one of the finest and most life-enhancing stimulants to health, happiness and longevity."
Let's imagine you're sitting in a fancy New York restaurant faced with an equally fancy bill and a very expectant waiter - not to mention your wine waiter (the sommelier, the maitre d'hotel, and even the coat-check attendant, doorman and valet car-parking attendant). There's already a hefty 9% state tax added to your bill. If the restaurant is ultra-elite there may even be a cover (couvert) charge in there too. And now the terrible question. How much to tip? Ten percent was considered inadequate even in the 80s - surely it must be at least 15% - maybe 20% nowadays - for the waiter alone... . And the bill includes the price of your drinks so you'll be tipping for those too. So does that mean you don't need to tip the wine waiter?

Such dilemmas can ruin an otherwise glorious gourmet experience.

Maybe you should have dined instead in Iceland or Norway - or even Australia and New Zealand where tips are usually unnecessary. Or best of all, in Japan - where tipping is considered offensive and will invariably be refused (in that always polite, forever-smiling and bowing Japanese manner).

And, of course, tipping in restaurants is only part of the problem. A recent study by the Cornell University School of Hotel Administration in the USA found that Americans tend to tip at least 31 out of 33 'service' employees, ranging from hotel maids, concierges, and taxi drivers to hairstylists, barmen and bellmen.

Also, according to the same study, Americans are among the most generous tippers in the world, followed closely by Canadians, Egyptians, Spanish and Portuguese. Possibly a little unkindly, the report suggested the more neurotic, highly-strung and alcoholic the population the higher the propensity to tip generously.

One of the worst 'tip-prone' experiences tends to be on cruises where 'suggested gratuities' can include as many as at least 7 'service' categories and increase your costs by as much as $30 per passenger per day! (Thanks should go to such notable cruise line exceptions as Silversea, Seabourn and Radisson, all of whom emphasize their 'no-tipping' policies.)

So here are a few key hints to help you through the maze of tipping customs:

• Check a reliable guidebook or website for specific advice on customs relating to tipping in whichever country you're visiting.
• Ask, particularly in hotels and on cruise ships, etc., about customary tipping expectations.
• Ask at restaurants (particularly in Europe) whether a service charge is already included in the bill (in addition to that notorious covert or 'cover-charge'!)
• With the exception of token tips of small amounts for hotel doormen and car valets, base your tipping on the quality of service, food, room service, etc. Start at zero for zero-satisfaction; 10% for 'just about average'; 15% for good, and 20%-plus for 'outstanding' or 'world-class' personal treatment.
• Tips are obviously important to those who receive them. Often waiters accept low (or, in some restaurants, no) wages and survive almost entirely on tips that are usually 'pooled' and divided between them and the kitchen staff. However, just as you are expected in most countries to reward good service, you should also express clear dissatisfaction at poor service, inadequate food, etc. by withholding or seriously limiting your monetary 'thanks.' If necessary, back up your decision by a brief chat with the manager.
• If you're trying to establish a 'loyalty-relationship' with a particular hotel or restaurant to ensure priority treatment on subsequent visits, you may have to dip a little deeper in your pockets than usual. But don't forget - once you're known as a 'big-tipper' you'll have to live up to their expectations on each future occasion.
• In hotels, particularly, think of tips as incentives to ensure your personal wellbeing. For example, a tip of a couple of dollars to a helpful bellman followed by a polite suggestion that an upgrade would be much appreciated (and rewarded) may lift you quickly from a rack-rate room to luxury. A similar successful request to a front desk employee should be followed by a generous tip, preferably in an envelope with the individual's name on it. Similar incentive-treatment for the maitre d' of a restaurant will usually ensure pleasant and preferential treatment.

Tipping guidelines

Nothing is etched in stone but, in the USA, for example, the following suggestions apply:

• Taxi driver - 10-15% of fare (but zero if he's one of those belligerent types!).
• Parking valet -- $1- $2
• Bellman - for luggage handling $1 - $2/bag
• Housekeeper $1-$2 a day
• Concierge - for specific assistance (tickets etc.) $5 - $10
• Waiters 15--20% if gratuities not included in the bill
• Wine Steward - for personal service, 10% of the wine bill
• Barman - 5-10% of drinks bill (very optional!) but for waiter/waitress bar-table service opt for around 10% if adequate and friendly.
• Coat check -- $1 per coat

The bottom line

This may seem a little daunting but, after all, the whole point of successful traveling is to eliminate unnecessary embarrassment and stress. You'll often be amazed how a pleasant manner and modest generosity will pay off in pampered luxury! However, try not to buy 'approval' through excessive largesse or 'guilt-gifts'. It usually won't produce much and you'll only make it more difficult for the rest of us!

And after all, a sincere, personal "thank you" to those who have made your travels a little more enjoyable, is very often the most appreciated 'gift' of all.